Low Roar.

Accidents happen. Sometimes we are made to feel bad about it, sometimes we just cannot help it. Good can come from it, if you look closer. I accidentally found Low Roar. I cannot find any fault in this.

I think they’re a duo. I know there are some shit duos, but I’m not exactly going to write about something I don’t like. I don’t understand that. To hell with all the negativity in the world. Low Roar have created some of the most loving, gentle and peaceful music I’ve ever heard. Sure I love some shouty music every now and then. But sometimes, I just want to hear something calming and gentle. I’ve truly found that in Low Roar. They have that beauty that is in the likes of Boards Of Canada but their tame and loving sound is like no other at all.

This is the kind of music you listen to when you feel low and delicate. This is the kind of music that makes you feel like you are being held softly until everything just feels right once more. When that lonely feeling creeps up towards you, Low Roar act like a deterrent and chase it away with their tranquil sounds. The mood they create is just so beautiful. I don’t understand why music like this isn’t huge, this is what the world needs. But hey, we can’t have everything. Just treasure them in your own way and don’t ever let go.

Billie Holiday.

 

 

97 years ago today the GREATEST female singer of all time was born. Her voice could break your heart, it still does. Listen to Strange Fruit and you will feel such hate for humanity because of how cruel they are. Listen to P.S. I Love You, and your heart will ache from how loving it is. Her voice was a voice that STILL inspires so many singers now. If it wasn’t for her, we wouldn’t have so many of the strong female singers we have now. She was as powerful as she was weak, and that is what made her believable and easy to relate to.

I did part of my dissertation at Uni about her. I learnt so much about her. Until then I just respected and loved the voice. The further I delved into her background, the more I felt towards her music. Her music oozed love and pain. Just like her life. Swindled out of money during the last few years of her life, it’s just so sad. A vulnerable and talented woman who changed music forever.

Happy Birthday Billie Holiday xx

TRUST.

I’m fascinated with duos. How two people can make incredible sounds leaves me in awe. Most of the bands I love are duos. Some are noisy, some create hypnotic calming sounds. The latter applies to my latest obsession-Trust.

Canada has produced some amazing bands. My all time favourite being Metric. Now, Toronto has given us one of the best acts around- Trust. My love for them was instant and will more than likely spiral out of control. Typing this is like having a conversation with myself because I doubt any of my friends will dig Trust. They’ll probably give me that look that I am all too familiar with. I have to share my love of music with someone or something, so I write it here. Maybe one day, someone will pick up on it. Trust have this heightened feel to their music. You feel like you are being taken to this secret world. It feels dark, but also really really euphoric. For me, it feels like an outer body experience listening to them.

If you’re a fan of The Knife, Alpines..bands like that- then you’ll love Trust. I’m typing this and every inch of my body hurts. I’ve got some horrific cold going on, I can forget how awful I feel by listening to Trust’s beautiful music.

They make me want to shut my eyes, stand in a forest and let a wave of darkness just take over. Then I open my eyes and I am in the midst of a strobe light battle. It creates such vivid imagery in your mind. They have the dark feel of Bauhaus but the trippy feel of Warpaint. To say I’m in love with them is an understatement.  They’re the kind of band that when you listen to them, you think “I’ve been searching for this sound all my life.” A relief takes over, and you know nothing is ever going to be the same again now you’ve found them. There’s hope, darkness and wonder in their music. Escapism comes through in their music, let them guide you. You’ll probably discover something utterly beautiful.

 

Gossip-Perfect World (video.)

Being yourself is a chore. You are frequently told to “be yourself.” But as soon as you are, people shoot you down for it and judge you. They judge you HARD for it. You like a band no one has really heard of- they call you pretentious. You do something positive with your life leaving the past behind- you’re called various expletives just because you’re doing something with your life. Put yourself first, and you are called selfish. What is up with that? Can’t we just stop being dicks to each other? No? Didn’t think so.

Sometimes, we struggle with who we are. I struggled for bloody years with being gay. I loathed myself and the rest of it. Then I listened to Gossip. It was Jason’s Basement that I remember first hearing. I fell in love. Every record got me through that struggle of accepting who I was. Thing is, I don’t let my sexuality define who I am. I don’t go up to new people and say “HI, I’M OLIVIA AND I’M A LESBIAN.” Fuck no. Who cares. I can accept myself, I don’t care for others opinion. Gossip taught me how to feel at ease with who I am and to not be ashamed.

Perfect World is another empowering anthem from Nathan, Hannah and Beth. The video is beautifully shot. Cannot wait for the new record. I spent most of my time at Uni following the band around. Skipping lectures just to see them. Seeing them live is like a religious experience. You feel weightless and trouble-free. Your body is full of love and you feel like you can do anything. I just bloody love them.

Dum Dum Girls-FD Acoustic Session.

Whilst I was waiting for my (delayed) flight home this afternoon, I was stood in line feeling sorry for myself as I was feeling a bit delicate (hungover, or so I thought- turns out I’ve got a cold which is hurting every part of me!) so I played Dum Dum Girls. I felt like Dee Dee’s gentle voice was nursing me through my wait and ill state. I had them on repeat, and started to perk up a little bit. I also napped on my flight. It’s better than staying awake and looking out the window thinking “OH SHIT!” as you look down. Besides, I like being asleep. I can’t bother anyone and no one can bother me..sometimes.

They did a little acoustic session recently in France and honestly, I don’t think any words can justify how beautiful the performance is. Dee Dee, in my eyes, is THE most underrated singer around. More people need to know and love Dum Dum Girls. They’re just a stunning band that have songs that will break your heart, fix your heart and make you dance. Since falling in love with them in 2009 they have kept me sane when I thought I was going to lose my shit. I have no idea what I would’ve done without last year’s Only In Dreams. Coming Down will always be a crutch to me. Hold Your Hand breaks my heart, to not be moved by this song well- you may be heartless.

“Shake your head, it’s empty.”

Wants and needs cloud your judgement. It’s easier to ignore them both so you can carry on. And carry on you will. This is the hangover talking. Not in a physical sense, that passed at half 10 this morning when I stood in the shower playing Explode by Uh Huh Her about 5 times until I felt like a person again. Things go wrong very quickly, you try to be cautious. You do what is right. You leave things behind so you can move forward. The things you never faced smack you right in the face when you have brief moments on your own. I’m trying to distance myself from this because some things, well..you’ve got to never tell so you stay sane. So what happens? Lose.Your.Shit. Lose your mind if you want. Nobody is strong all the time. Nobody is always weak. You can find strength in the things you think are killing you, metaphorically. You hold everything back. And for what reason? You’ve got your reasons. You try to let it out, but for some reason- it just won’t come out. Not because you’re biting your tongue constantly, but..the words. The words are not there. So you find a sense of peace and become calm in the midst of hearing THAT certain part in a song that you love. The song that cradles you. The song that nurses you. Like a whisper in your ear, “It’s going to be okay.” It will be okay.

One day I will take on board what I have just typed up. Until then, I’ll remain a hypocrite, or maybe just one of life’s lost causes plodding their way through. Knowing that nothing is secure, or forever. Time is just a way of limiting yourself. I never wear a watch. Lose yourself to something positive than give yourself up to something destructive. This is why I don’t show my poetry or songs to anyone. It goes deeper than the paragraph above, and I’m ashamed of it.

So, with this utter nonsense out of the way- there are songs. There are always songs. Songs that will drag you through because you just don’t want to think about how you’d word it. Wants and needs. You want a person, but do you need them? Anyone who says they don’t need anyone is lying. Even if it’s just one person, you cannot deny that you need them. It doesn’t have to be in a romantic way. A relative, a close chum- you need them. You want them around. You think you’re going to lose them at times. You think you’re about to because the Universe is a fucking BITCH. Solace is found in music. Shut it all off and fall into the music. It’s the only way you know how. And maybe…just maybe we are all struggling to get to the same thing in life. So, please be kind to everyone. Be respectful and tolerant. Walk gently through life and do everything with heart. Speak up. Be strong, be weak. Be yourself.

Willis Earl Beal-Monotony (video.)

My love for Willis is huge. It is going to spiral out of control, and I refuse to feel bad about it. I don’t know anyone personally who loves this guy. I guess I’ll cling onto that and keep it as sacred listening. The album (Acousmatic Sorcery) is the year’s best debut record. Forget what you’ve heard, this is THE ONE. It is pure, frail, raw and truthful. Everything about it is just so deep and powerful.

Personally, my favourite track off the record is Monotony. The lyrics just really mean a lot to me. Listen to the song, its pretty easy to understand why. The video is as moving as the song. The bouts of vulnerabilty and openess in this track is just utterly comforting- and much needed in music right now. Willis is the saviour.

Garbage-Blood For Poppies (video.)

I woke up feeling delicate and hungover. I decided I wasn’t hungover, I was still appreciating the night before. I rid myself of this feeling by standing in the shower playing Explode by Uh Huh Her a few times until I felt like I was human again. I had two cups of tea in the space of 10 minutes. Did it work? Pretty much, yes. However I can add something else to my cure. The new video by my beloved, my lifeline- Garbage.

Shot in black and white, yeah I guess it reminds you of their video to Queer. The video is beautiful. Each member is stunning, and I could feel myself just falling in love over and over with the band. Times have been tough and shit for me recently, but I’ve been clinging onto the new Garbage stuff (and old) to get me through. By get me through, I mean dragging me up from this rut and into something better. You’ve got to believe that there is something better and it will pick up otherwise, you’re as good as dead. Not that I feel alive (I guess you can call this an emotional hangover kicking in now.) It’s just, Garbage are not just a band to me. They saved my life during my teenage years. Since I was 8 years old my heart has firmly been theirs. I’ve given a part of myself to them that I don’t think I could give a person. Not because I’m a cold person (far from it) but because the love you give to a band is like the love you get from a pet. A pet adores you and expects nothing from you. Just shelter and love. Garbage are my protection. Garbage are my one true love. You know, when Shirl read my article on Bleed Like Me and told me it made her cry- that was the only time I felt like I’d done something right. I felt like all my years of struggling as a writer were suddenly worth it. My hero has seen my work- does it get better than that? No. No amount of money in the world can top that. I am not moved by material things. I’m not sure if I’m going to get a chance to see them on their tour this Summer. If I do, I’ll probably have to go it alone. I don’t think anyone I know needs to see me be an emotional mess. I NEED to see them because I am in need of that feeling you get when you see the band that saved your life live.

Anyway, I guess I just used this as a way to express my love and devotion for a band that have always been there for me when I felt like a hopeless mess. Garbage have given me hope and strength. They gave me the guts to speak up and to stand by everything I believe in. Follow your heart, and don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do it. That’s what they’ve taught me. Forever in debt. Forever theirs.

 

The Lovely Bad Things.

If its good for you, you’ll probably shy away from it. If there’s a chance it’ll be bad for you, you’ll probably be attracted to it. I guess that’s why I love the band name, The Lovely Bad Things. Its pretty true. Most things that are bad for you, can sometimes be lovely. It’s a different conversation altogether, so I’ll ignore it.

Yeah, another band from L.A. Another band that just make me wish I was there. It’s not that I hate England, I’m just entirely bored of it. How I’ve lasted this long doing the same thing day in, day out without losing whatever I have left of my mind is starting to baffle me. It’s not that I want to live in L.A, I just NEED to be there. We do confuse our wants and needs. Much like we confuse our ideas of love, and if we actually love something/someone. The mind will always cloud your judgement. So, I listen to bands like The Lovely Bad Things to make me feel like I’m already in L.A. I’m there in mind and spirit. I’m just working on the body part. Things take time.

I adore The Lovely Bad Things because they have a slight angsty feel mixed with this remarkable lo-fi sound. They take parts of all the aspects of music that I love, and just create their own sound that makes me feel like I’m in some sweaty, dingy basement watching them rehearse. This is the kind of thing I want to feel. These are the images I want a band to conjure up in my mind. Reckless, ruthless riots. Why settle for something calm when you can have a chaotic whirlwind erupt in the depths of your mind.

Abandon everything you know and start all over again. Abandon it all, and keep The Lovely Bad Things playing in your mind. It’ll probably steer you towards something solid in your head/heart (it depends which you favour/follow.)

Play it loud, and be kind.

Garbage-Battle In Me.

I’m just torturing myself by listening to this, because I’m going to be missing out on their tour. I’ve been waiting so long to see my ultimate heroes live..but I guess I’m going to have to wait this one out-again. Obviously I’d welcome someone saying, “Hey, here’s a ticket go see the band that saved your life.” It won’t happen. There’s more chance of me marrying Alison Mosshart really..actually, there’s more chance of…fuck it, it’s not going to happen. I can’t think of anything.

Battle In Me, in my very biased opinion is incredible. Garbage are one of the few bands I love that have NEVER done a song that I think “Oh this is weak.” I love everything they have done, and everything they do.

That raw sound they had on their debut record and on Version 2.0 is alive on Battle In Me. I’ve heard some say “Oh they’ve gone back to that sound.” Garbage do have a sound, but you cannot define it with any of their records. It goes beyond being a sound. It is an attitude, a way of thinking and a way of living.

I’m not ashamed to say that I probably would be here if it wasn’t for Garbage. They’re not just a band to me, they’re a lifeline. And those that have loved them from the start know exactly what I mean.

Battle In Me is powerful, raw and passionate. Everything I love about them and more.