You have to wait a long time for good things to happen. Thee good things don’t have to be huge. They can be anything; but everything to you. I wait and wait for my favourite bands to release new music, and when they do this strange and euphoric feeling takes over. This is happening right now.
I won’t ever EVER have a bad word said about Suede. I still regard Brett Anderson as one of the best frontmen ever. Do you remember when everyone was a bit silly in the 90s and thought Oasis and/or Blur were the best thing? How foolish. I didn’t like either. I still don’t. My heart and ears belonged to Suede. I remember first seeing Brett Anderson flail around to Metal Mickey on Top Of The Pops and I fell in love. It was a deep obsession that just grew and grew over time. His solo work is just as beautiful. I’m worried about my attraction towards him, but I don’t want any help. My girlfriend has nothing to worry about though.
Bloodsports is Suede’s first release in just over a decade. Some may think that, over such a long space of time that Suede may have given in to how modern music now sounds. Would they go synth crazy? Or even worse, would the band wear ill-fitting chinos and raid the sale section in Topman? Fortunately, they’ve done neither. They’ve remained true to themselves. They have a very distinctive sound. A sound that is found in no other band before or after them. Proving that they will forever be timeless.
The record starts with Barriers. As I listen to Bloodsports, I really cannot fault their decision to open the record with that song. It really does set the tone for Bloodsports. Bloodsports is made up of anthemic songs for you to cry out in your bedroom that posses such pleading and beautiful lyrics. This is why I love Suede. Their songs may sound as if they would sound perfect in a massive arena, but the thing is, as the lyrics are so vulnerable you cannot imagine listening to this record with anyone. That’s just my personal view. I couldn’t imagine listening to Bloodsports with anyone. It feels like such a personal record.
If you’re looking to have your heart broken, then listen to What Are You Not Telling Me or if you fancy something that contains a euphoric build-up then listen to Always but if you are seeking comfort in any form; then please just go out next Monday and buy Bloodsports from your local record shop. Part of me wants to say that this record will only be understood by the proper Suede fans. Not the ones who only know Beautiful Ones and that’s it. But the thing is, it is a perfect record from start to finish; everybody should hear it. Buy it for your lover, relatives and the friends that you can stand. I don’t care. Just have this brilliant record in your collection and give it to others. Every single song on Bloodsports gives you answers to the questions that keep you up at night. But, Suede- what took you so long? It’s not that I mind because Bloodsports is truly worth the wait.
Hit Me is my favourite off Bloodsports. It is an open letter. That’s the only way you can describe it. You simply must play it loud and imagine you are singing it to those who get in your way and put you down. The way Brett sings “I’m not as strong as I pretend to be”is just so captivating. A line so simple, yet painfully easy to connect with.
Bloodsports is 10 songs all crafted so perfectly and beautifully. If we have to have to wait another 11 years for a masterpiece, then so be it. You can easily forgive them for it because they’re just so divine. Bloodsports is made up of delicate bedroom anthems. Sing, scream along. With Suede, you are never alone.
If the mind could take a holiday, would you let it or would you let yourself carry on? Bad things happen and good people go unnoticed. Too many people want to be famous, anonymity is no longer sought after. It’s a shame. Everything is shame; especially when you cannot do anything about it. We remember bad news because it lasts longer than anything good. We condition ourselves to cling onto the bad because it’s a sick form of comfort. The good slips through, as does time. As much as I dislike the concept of time I am utterly fascinated by it. Yesterday I had a job interview near Camden, so afterwards I went for a walk around Camden. On my own. It was pissing down with rain and I wandered round listening to music. If it wasn’t so grim outside, I’d have stayed longer. Camden isn’t my favourite place in London, far from it. I’m not really sure where my favourite place is in London. I just love that city. I used to hate it. I’m not sure why I hated it so much. Now? Now I have less positive feelings for the North of England. Maybe it’s a shame, maybe it isn’t. But you see, the North is always tinted with a shade of grey. London isn’t. It has something else, like no other. Or maybe I’m just really pleased with myself that I can use the tube all by myself without getting lost. Proud moment.
I wandered around the city a few times. No one knew me, and I didn’t know them. When I thought I got lost I just went a different way and got to where I wanted to go. Even if I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be there; I still got there. Time, patience and being aware. In a way, I could apply that to life. My life to be exact. Of course I could. I should. I’m going to try. I took great comfort in nobody knowing who I was. Not caring if I bumped into someone I knew. Stopping to talk to a friend in the street is something I’m not a fan of. I’d rather just sit down with them somewhere. Standing in the street to discuss events and emotions seems to informal. Also, you’re in the way of passers-by. If there’s one thing I dislike, it’s me being in the way of someone. Keeping distance is an art-form. I think I’ve gently got to grips with it. It’s not a tight grip; it never is.
It’s that time of year where I hate myself even more for not having a job or money. Christmas doesn’t bother me; it’s not having money to not go to SXSW that really gets to me. As a music obsessive, SXSW is my idea of heaven. I’ve never been to a music festival nor do I ever want to go to one. Stand in a field surrounded by drunken twats that smell of piss listening to the outline of bass rather than an actual song? No thanks. If I wanted that, I’d go to a club. And I don’t like clubs. SXSW seems like a classier affair. Where people actually care about music. No one is there to get so drunk they throw up and pass out. They are there to discover new music in brilliant venues. Bands from all over the world are there. Shit..last year The Jesus And Mary Chain played. I watched a bit of it on the internet and felt a rush of self-hate mixed with love for that band merge as one. I don’t know what I felt, but I just wished I was there. One year, I will go. I just have to. Maybe I should play the lottery, maybe that’d increase my chances.
I haven’t written anything for a while. I don’t know why. I haven’t even written any lyrics or poetry in my notebooks for a long time. I expect too much from myself at times with that. I’m not some literary machine. I never will be. I’ll take inspiration where I can, and when. I’m 100% sure I’d have found a lot at SXSW.
But all is not bad. After waiting for many years, I finally have tickets to see Beach House in 2 weeks in London. Two days after I’m seeing Foals. If there was an award for “Best Girlfriend In The Universe” mine would win. Not only just for this, but for her general being.
So this week will be spent mostly wishing I was at SXSW in small and sweaty venues with bands that would blow my mind. There’s always Record Store Day to look forward to.
One person can make so much noise it feels like a riot in your head. With no control over your body, you just let it happen. You become like jelly, and in your head; you’ve never felt better. The worst thing any music writer/critic/journalist/whatever can say about a band/singer is “THIS IS SO NOW.” Music has no time. It is timeless and at its best, inspiring. Scenes come and go. Like friends, enemies and pets. Nothing is permanent, and if it was I think it’d freak a lot more people out.
A freak out ensued when I heard Autumns. Autumns is one person, and you can call him Christian. When you listen to his music, you may think he’s from the hidden depths of an American town that is populated by feral animals and desolate buildings. He’s not. He’s from Derry and he is only 19 year olds. He’s the Derry version of Dirty Beaches. Meaning; he is one person making the most beautiful noise all by himself. He writes, plays and records everything himself. He does it with heart, soul and sheer passion. He makes you want to pick up a guitar and thrash about, unleashing all the fury your bones can contain. He has this infectious raw energy which projects into this brilliant rambunctious sound he has created.
The term that’s been used to describe his music (which started as a joke) is “Bedroom Wall of Sound.” The thing is, when you listen to his music, even straight away- you know that this is the only way to describe it. His music is refreshingly free of any genre/silly sub-genres. It is just a delight to hear something so pure.
The reverb in the guitar and his wonderfully muffled voice is everything I love about music. You can tell that Christian is a music obsessive. Especially as the two-track cassette will be released on my favourite label, Soft Power Records. The tape comes out on the 15th April, but be quick because there aren’t many copies being made. Get your mucky hands and eager ears on this.
Today was abysmal, but has been made a hell of a lot better by my FAVOURITE band putting up a demo.
I think anyone who has the un/fortunate experience of talking to me about music will ALWAYS have my love for Dum Dum Girls expressed. For me, they’re not just a band. You see, Dee Dee’s words have provided a crutch for me since 2009. I Will Be blew me away, Only In Dreams got me through hell. And their two EPs and countless b-sides have provided me with more than enough to get through dreary and dark days, like today. I haven’t wanted to write in a while, but the new Dum Dum Girls demo has given me a slight hint of inspiration.
Wish You Well may just be a demo, but no part of me wants Dee Dee to change any of it. It has a haunting and vulnerable vibe to it that makes you fall even more in love with Dum Dum Girls. Dee Dee has the power and strength that is found in the likes of Patti Smith and Shirley Manson; two women which I regard as the ultimate role models. Dee Dee will no doubt be regarded as highly as these two amongst fans of the Dum Dum Girls.
Wish You Well has been described by Dee Dee as a “demo lullaby” and to be honest, there is no better description. I could happily have this on repeat until my eyes became heavy and I could no longer battle sleep. From an entirely selfish point of view, this song is what I need right now. It’s more than enough to pull through. Her delicate words are married together with Sammy Nikdel’s echoing and ethereal guitar playing.
Dum Dum Girls have no set sound, but they always ALWAYS do one thing to me and that is heal. There aren’t many bands or singers that can do this in such a careful and thoughtful manner. I just adore the band and Dee Dee’s way with words. It isn’t just music; it is poetry. They aren’t just a band; they are a way of escaping the cold (even in a metaphorical sense.)
Regardless of how this song turns out, with it just being a demo for now, it is divine. A simple piece of heaven and I really cannot wait for record number three. Dee Dee, thank you. Just..thank you.
You can listen to the demo here: https://soundcloud.com/wearedumdumgirls
My love for Cold Cave is grand, but my love for them is also saddened today after hearing that former member Justin Benoit had died. You don’t need to know someone personally to feel sad about their passing.
Justin was part of a band that helped me grow up and face up to adulthood, amongst other painful life chores. He was part of band that provided more comfort than I could imagine a band ever doing so. I don’t need to write an essay about this for it is obvious from anyone who knew him how awful this loss is.
Wherever he is now, I hope he is safe and at peace. R.I.P Justin xx
Five years ago today I was sat in a room at University in an Online Journalism class. This module basically was for us all to start our own blog. What we did with it after the module ended was our own business I guess. I carried on. I carried on because I found a platform where I could express my love for music in a way I’d never done before. It wasn’t just music, it was life events and situations that also tie in with music. Which made me realise that music is my life, it truly truly is. Everyone has a passion in life, it’s obviously what mine is.
Over the past five years of running this blog I have been fortunate enough to befriend bands (Royal Chant, I’m looking at you..lovingly of course) and I’ve discovered new bands that have just blown my mind. I’ve interviewed bands/singers that have inspired me in many ways (meeting Warpaint was beyond words) and I also made my role model, Shirley Manson cry with a piece I wrote about how important Garbage’s record Bleed Like Me is to me. Being thanked by Crocodiles for something I wrote about them meant more to me than I ever thought it would. I’ve never been paid to write anything, and as clichéd as it sounds- no amount of money can put a price on any of that, and also how much I love writing about music.
I’m still convinced that the only person who reads this is my mum. I’ll never get why anyone would go out of their way to read one of my rants, but when I get an email or whatever from someone on the other side of the world telling me they connected with something I’ve written; it justifies why I write. I do it for me, but I also do it in the hopes someone who loves music as much as I do doesn’t feel so alone and strange with their love for it.
I’ve resigned myself to the fact (and it isn’t a bad thing at all) that the only solid source of comfort I have is probably found in a song by The Long Wives. I’ve honestly never found a singer who releases so much music as frequently as she does, and I am so thankful for that. It seems she releases something when I am in need of feeling something other than I do; her dark and vulnerable words do something that nothing else has done.
With its glorious religious imagery and vengeful words, Break You In is enough to shatter a tough heart and weaken the strongest of minds. When she sings, “I’ve served my time”I can feel all my frustrations pour out into this song, Maybe 9.30am is far too early to have these deep feelings, but they are there. And maybe some of them have to come out.
What I love about Brandy’s music is that I do not relate it to anyone but myself. I’m not a selfish person, but this is as selfish as I get to be honest. I can relate to every single word she has sung and written down; they remind me of nobody but myself. No other band or singer has ever done that. I usually listen to a song and I can associate it with something or someone. Thankfully with Brandy’s music, I just direct it to myself. Maybe it’s self-indulgent, or maybe it is much-needed. I’m going with the latter.
Her voice always does something overwhelming and incredible to me, as if it is some kind of catharsis. It is a release of sorts, and quite frankly, a much-needed one. Break You In shows just how strong Brandy’s voice is. They was she sings certain words just posses such strength and determination, there’s no way you couldn’t relate to her words. The fury and passion in her words and music just shows she is more than a singer. She’s a poet, a storyteller with words that come strictly from the heart. As awfully clichéd as it is, she is real. She has a raw talent and posses delicate words that make you feel at ease. I’ve never felt at home anywhere, ever. But her words are like home. Comforting and safe yet brutally honest.
To compare this song or any of her music to someone else would be a foolish mistake, and maybe I’ve done that before but songs like this just cement how rare Brandy is. I’d say we need more singers/bands like her, but I don’t want that. I’m just happy one person is making music as honest and as ethereal as this.
You can listen to Break You In here: https://soundcloud.com/thelongwives/break-you-in-the-long-wives
A few things in life bother me. These things may be trivial, but the others may mean something. I despise injustice and any form of judgement cruel and utterly vile. From name-calling to violence, it is all disgusting and just cannot be tolerated. Which has sort of led me to something that’s been irking me for some time. This minor rant may be incoherent, but I’ve never stated anything I write to make sense.
You can try to disguise it all you want but all forms of sexism, racism and homophobia is in music. It’s bad enough it being on our doorsteps, but when it is in something so many of us use as a form of escapism, then something MUST be done. But how? Because you see, we are all entitled to “free speech” but to what extent? Free speech is a basic human right. As is the right to live in peace, free of any judgement from small-minded fools. This would happen in a perfect world, but the world (as its inhabitants) is full of flaws.
The thing that has sparked my rage is Azealia Banks’ use of the word “faggot.” Obviously as a gay woman, I find this word bloody offensive. I also hate anyone (regardless of colour) using the N word. I cannot even type it. It’s a totally vile word to use. I don’t care who uses it; it’s a horrible word. Great people such as Rosa Parks to Malcom X were subjected to racial hatred for most of their lives. So why is the N word seen as “acceptable”?
I’ve been in clubs (not a fan of them, I’d rather read a book) and I have seen flocks of white people sing along to that awful Jay-Z and Kanye West song, N**** In Paris. Aside from the song being utterly awful, seeing a bunch of white people recite the words including the N word is just heartbreaking. I know I could possibly be stupid for writing any of this down and having such feelings towards it; but that’s just how I am.
Thing is, I love Hip Hop. I was massively obsessed with it from the ages of 12-18. It was a huge part of my life, and dragged me through my teenage years. Eric B & Rakim’s records got me through a lot. Do I recall them ever using the N word? No. Never. It was a word that I never heard from them. Rakim rarely cursed on their songs; making way for intellect. I’ve always had a soft spot for conscientious rappers such as Mos Def, Common, Talib Kweli and Jurassic 5 (yes I know they use the N word, but it isn’t as frequent as most.) Thing is, I didn’t listen (and still don’t) listen to Hip Hop to rap along. I listen to it because it is like poetry. Just like Gil Scott-Heron and The Lost Poets. They paved the way for intellect to just shine. Lyrical content, in any genre, is important. Well for me it is anyway. Others just want a good beat. I don’t. I want something that makes me think and makes me write my own thoughts down in a similar way. My love for Hip Hop will ALWAYS be firmly in my heart, and on my mind. Especially when I think of the songs that made being a teenager less of a challenge. I remember someone grabbing hold of my Sony Walkman and saying “What are you listening to?” And I told them it was Gangstarr (Guru, bless his soul, was one of the greats) and they said “Why are you listening to that Black music?!” in such a disgusted tone. I walked away. I had no response because I feel if I unleashed how mad they made me, I would never have shut up. How can music have a colour? Maybe it can. I’m not sure. The thing is, as a rule, I really don’t like White rappers. Mainly because their lyrical content and voices just annoy me. I really don’t get the appeal of Eminem nor do I get the hype surrounding that Mackelmore. Don’t get me started on certain English ones. Am I being racist towards “my own kind’? I don’t think I am. I’m just saying I don’t like the style of some White rappers. I don’t like 50 Cent. Not because he’s Black, but because of his songs. Simple as.
I’m slowly reaching my point.
Recently there’s been an exchange of insults between Azealia Banks and whoever she feels like attacking. One that’s stood out is her row with Perez Hilton. I heard 212 by Azealia and genuinely loved it. I loved Jumangi, I really did and I loved Vogue. But recently, her online spats have caused her to appear like a petulant child. Using the F word (I’m not typing it, I’ve done it once and cannot do it again) towards Perez Hilton was not just offensive to him; but the vast majority of the LGBT community. Whether or not she knows it, Azealia has a lot of homosexual fans and may have lost a lot by acting in such a vile way. When she said she used the word to say that she used it as a way to describe “a male that acts like a female’ instead of using it as a homophobic slur, it is still offensive. To men and women; regardless of sexuality. She claims that society has accepted the N word, but has it? Am I in the minority where I find the word disgusting and offensive? No one, regardless of colour, should claim that word. I’m gay but no part of me wants to claim the F word at all. It sounds horrible and the word cannot leave my tongue; let alone type it.
Music is a form of expression. A form of expression in its purest form. We will never stop people using hurtful language in their music. People use it as an escape and as a way of feeling at ease. Maybe because Azealia is so young she doesn’t understand the consequences of using such words, or maybe she does. Only she knows. If it’s some shitty publicity stunt, then she doesn’t need to do it. Her music is decent, but I don’t know if I want to be a fan of someone who uses the F word and thinks its alright. I also think stupid people use the word “gay” to describe something that’s shit. People are becoming less and less familiar with proper words, so they resort to using words like that. If something is rubbish, then say it is rubbish. Do not use a word used to describe someone’s sexuality to belittle it. I don’t care what your sexuality is, when you use the word “gay” to describe something rubbish, then maybe you need to go back to school and re-learn English Language.
If I’ve offended, then I’m sorry. That wasn’t my intention. It never is. Writing is my outlet because I’m awfully shy and vocally, rubbish with words. Maybe I’m useless with writing them down. I have no idea, but who does. I hate injustice and use of hateful words. From anyone using the N word to some idiot calling someone a “slut” because of what they are wearing. Words hold more power than we sometimes realise. It’s easy to say we should think before we speak, but most find it hard to practice. It’s easy to use the tongue and unleash words without thinking, it happens. I understand that, but when you get to a point where you offend a group or whatever, then one must think entirely about what they are saying and why. If it’s just to get a rise out of others, then please PLEASE grow up. If it is because you are full of hate, then please go cuddle someone. Chances are you need to be exposed to love and a gentle touch.
Words can do more harm than good at times, but tied in with positive actions; words can heal and be of comfort. Enough with the hate, enough with offensive words. Open your eyes and educate yourself.
Equality is something we will all struggle to gain. In religion, race, sexuality, gender etc. Maybe one day views will change. An uphill struggle, but don’t back down.
Time drags, fucks you over, fucks you up, is a source of comfort, goes quickly and is a healer. Time can knock you back. Time can leave in awe of all that has happened. Time can mean everything or it can mean nothing. You can spend it wisely, you can be carefree with it. What you do with it is your own decision, but sometimes it rules you. It doesn’t have to always be like that but it just happens.
Time can be cruel. Time can be kind. Like people and the universe. It is good and bad. Separately and at once. I don’t wear a watch and I’m the worst person to ask what the date is. Yet I seem to be early for most things, I get that from my mum. My mum. This is who this is about, you don’t have to read any more if you don’t feel like it.
Two years ago today my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. If cancer was a person, it’d be the kind of person you’d want to punch as hard as you could on a daily basis. I’m not a violent person, but cancer makes you angry. The “why’s” and the “how’s” can consume you if you let them. Or you can be a tough-nut like my mum. I firmly believe she beat it because she wouldn’t let some fuck of a disease beat her. Everyone in one way or another is affected by cancer and the distress it brings. Why is there no cure? Well, that’s a different rant altogether really isn’t it. I don’t know if I have it in me to unleash all the rage towards why there isn’t a solid cure, but hey….like I said, a different rant. Different time.
As much as I class strong women like Shirley Manson and Patti Smith as my role models, first and foremost- my mum is. If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t have all the positive traits I have. Fortunately I took after her in so many ways. I know I’ll never be the toughest person in the world- it’s not something I ever wish to be now, there’s no point. But I get my strong mind and dedicated heart from my mum. There’s no one else in the world I’d want to be like. No one else at all (although I’d be totally fine if I looked like Alison Mosshart!)
I could quite happily write thousands of words yet feel it wasn’t enough. The main thing is, time has passed. It has dragged, kicked and screamed. It has also gone by really fast. It changes you. The whole thing two years ago changed me, but I’m the only one who noticed (others may say in a negative way, but their view is not only stupid; but it is also untrue.) Time can mould you and break you.
There was no real reason behind this, but I just felt I had to. Not everything in life needs an explanation I guess.
As my mum is the most important person in my life (closely followed by my gran..I won’t list the rest.) I thought I’d just put my favourite Yorkshire bands/singers here as my mum is a Yorkshire lass!
I have a job interview in a few hours, and there is no better way to prepare for it than writing about one of my favourite bands. A band that I’ve had the pleasure of interviewing (via email because sadly I don’t live in New York.) I first heard Sensual Harassment when I heard their song, Boss well over a year ago. I remember being hooked on the song and just constantly playing it over and over. I had no (and still don’t) words to describe the song, it was just a marvellous disco number that could make anyone (including myself) want to dance. They have an EP which is out now, and it pretty much makes you want to dance.
As I head into my second listen of Escape From Alpha Draconis, I cannot help but feel that this is what would happen if Dead Or Alive met Cold Cave and sampled something by Donna Summer. Is Goth-Dance a sub-genre? We need more pretentious and pointless sub-genres, so let’s have that one. But in all seriousness and I’m not just saying this because I adore the band, but this EP is just wonderful. Deep vocals over dark disco beats, it is just perfect.
Capri Suntan is a relaxed number that makes you feel as if you are watching the day pass by lazily on a beach somewhere with hazy sunshine warming your bones. The common reality will be that you look out the window and it’s a bit grey out side. Probably with a bit of snow (it’s turned to ice so I’m clearly going to fall over when I walk to the train station later!) You cannot help but fall deliriously in lust with this EP.
Another reason as to why I fully adore them is because they are a duo. I have a massive soft spot for duos as they always seem to work harder than most. They make the most noise and play with the utmost passion. I’m not someone who is a keen dancer, but Sensual Harassment yet again make me want to dance. Maybe like some flexible kid from the film, Wild Style. They’ve taken influences from everywhere and have made something of their own. Is it their best work? Sure it is, but that doesn’t weaken previous releases. It just means they’ve got a solid sound that allows them to grow and adapt, which makes them one of the best bands around.
Firmly underrated but remarkable all the same, Sensual Harassment are like a loving whisper in your ear that just makes you quiver. You cannot help but play their music loud and just move your limbs about in a care-free manner. Who cares who sees you, grab them and make them dance with you.
You can get the EP as a free download from their website here: http://www.sensualharassment.com/
Beat In My Bones. 