“I came up in the world with a pain in my back, And I never could run with the wolves in the pack.”
There is something, I guess, quite voyeuristic in a way about enjoying hearing really personal lyrics. I’ve always been fascinated with the way Morrissey manages to make ugly feelings seem comforting or the way Shirley Manson managed to drag me through my teenage years kicking and screaming with her words of encouragement. Patti Smith taught me how to be tough. Lou Reed showed me how to find some comfort in who/what I am. Bob Dylan freed my mind. The Jesus And Mary Chain and Nick Cave defined love in ways no one else really ever has. There’s still this amount of honesty floating around in music. Finding it is tougher than it used to me. With those I mentioned it was always there. Nowadays it is quite hit and miss, but there are of course, exceptions. There’s one guy that’s been on my mind for quite some time now. I had to listen for a while to want to write something of worth. Whether or not it is, well..that’s up to whoever reads it. Numbers don’t mean much. That’s why I write as if I’m the only one reading.
Last week Ezra Furman’s new record came out, Day Of The Dog. It’s the definition of pure Rock & Roll. Some songs have a real 50s vibe to it (The Mall, a Paul Baribeau cover) yet others have a real ferocious feel to them (Tell ‘Em All To Go To Hell.) He portrays love, loss and everything that is involved in these two feelings in such a beautiful way. The Mall, even though it isn’t Ezra’s song, is one of the most heartbreaking and honest songs I’ve heard in a long time. You can really pick up the sadness here, and the sadness is so pure. “I am broken, wide open. Bleeding everywhere.” Sounds like it should be in a Hawthorne Heights song, right? Ezra sings it in a desperate way that makes you listen and really feel it. If anyone else did it, you’d probably tell them to fuck off. He’s got that loveable quality that is in someone who I really admire, Adam Green. He’s not afraid to be brutally honest. He doesn’t need to create pretentious prose in order for you to listen and to connect. Both are just brilliant musicians and lyricists.
As I listen to Day Of The Dog, it makes me glad that I stumble upon most music by accident. If I’ve not been emailed a band/demo, I usually find something by accident. Sometimes accidents are a good thing. Ezra plays with a glorious fury, and I think it is really clear on the song And Maybe God Is A Train. He’s got a Punk style to his words and music; he unleashes the frustrations of daily life out in a way that I wish I could. Pissed off at the government, lack of opportunities, the way people are shit to each other, the dullness of modern life- he just sums it all up in a way that may seem plain, but it hits you hard. You don’t need to sugarcoat situations at all, a great songwriter knows that. I think Ezra knows that. Slacker/Adria is one of the best songs I’ve heard this year, from a brutally honest kind of way. I think it is fair to say that this is probably Day Of The Dog could be the best thing Ezra has done so far.
Ezra is the kind of singer/songwriter those who want to make music should be listening to. He’s got the heart of Punk kid and the soul of a 50s Rock & Roll fanatic. The purity in his music is just magnificent. I’ve not really read any reviews about his music because for the most part, I dislike Music Journalists. The ones who just set up a blog or whatever and slag bands off- piss off. I studied Music Journalism at Uni, and I guess the degree I have serves no purpose, but people like Ezra are the reason as to why I don’t just love music; I need to have music playing. I need to find the next new band/singer that’s going to blow my mind or find an old band that make me realise yet again I was born at the wrong time. I should have been born in ’66 not ’86. I believe if you’re going to write about someone’s music, you should be passionate about it. If you don’t like it, don’t listen to it. Don’t write vicious words just to seem cool. Share the bands you love, and do it with love. If a band or singer are going to put their all into their music; you, as a writer of music, should put your all into writing about them.
That’s why I respect and admire Ezra. He puts his all into his music and time and time again creates something beautiful. His voice, his music and his words are just perfect and unlike anything else around. Maybe Ezra is a hopeless romantic like the rest of us, but he words it all in a way that makes the pains of everyday life less daunting to carry around. I think Metric summed it up best on their song Front Row, “He’s not perfect, he’s my hero.”
Soft Power Records have got a back catalogue that is on the same level as Sacred Bones to Art Fag. They have the weird and wonderful on their label. From Dirty Beaches split 7″ to Autumns, they are responsible (for the most part) for what I listen to on an almost daily basis. So it is with no surprise at all that they’ve sent me something else for me to fall hopelessly in love with.
This time, they’ve sent something they’ve never done before- a split LP. Knowing this is an entirely new thing made the whole listening process of the record much more exciting than most. This is a big deal for both bands and of course Soft Power Records.
The first half of the record belongs to The Wharves, and it’s ridiculous. They’re from London. They have a creepy late night alleyway danger feel about them. It’s the kind of music you’d imagine Jack The Ripper stalking the streets of Whitechapel to. It is entirely eerie but nothing short of brilliant. They do have a Garage rock atmosphere that floats throughout, but the thing that really stands out for me is the vocals. The vocals on Thick Syrup is just stunning, a brilliant way to start this LP. The vocals are on a different level. I’m not even going to try find a comparison because it will not work. But if you’re fans of September Girls and The Black Belles, then you’ll probably love The Wharves. Unhand Me is something that should be on Halloween playlists. Again, the vocals are divine but on this one they are slightly chilling. There’s a cryptic feel that flows throughout and I think that is what instantly draws you in. I probably couldn’t switch it off even if I wanted to. The Wharves make music that sounds like it should have been in a Vincent Price film. They stir up the beast inside of you and unleash a thousand furies. Bloody brilliant.
Scotland is the home to fine music. From my hero Shirley Manson to The Jesus And Mary Chain to The Creeping Ivies to The Rosy Crucifixion. Emily from the band was once described in an interview as Patsy Cline’s evil sister. To be described like that is awesome, more singers should aspire to that. Her vocals have an attitude that is found in the likes of Faith from PINS to Alison Mosshart from The Kills. There’s this infectious power there that just lures you in. I feel as if I should be wearing a cloak whilst listening to them (I’m actually wearing Superhero and a band t-shirt. The band? Loom.) They have a ghastly vibe; and I firmly believe that if music doesn’t scare you even a tiny bit, then there’s no point. Most of the bands I listen to have sinister sound. I think this makes up for the fact that I’m far too sensitive/gentle for my own good at times. Even if I’m not, music makes me feel tougher than I am. It’s like when you listen to the Ramones and you feel as if you can take on the world- you just don’t care. The Rosy Crucifixion and The Wharves have come together, and has led to something truly memorable and beautiful being created. I’ve heard a lot of new music this year, but to hear two of the most exciting bands around on one record like this just, as a music lover, well it feels like Christmas but better. Sinners has an enchanting voodoo feel about it. You can imagine Screamin’ Jay Hawkins (if he was alive obviously) just creeping up and yelling some crazy shit.
Both bands have made something that would sound perfect in a film from say, the 1920s. If I was 15 years old hearing this, it would sure make me go out and learn to play the guitar and create something as thrilling as this. This is what I want to hear. This is what I want on the airwaves and television sets. This split LP is something that sounds like it is from another time and planet. Play it loud and let everything around you just spiral out of control.
The LP is out 25th November 2013 on Soft Power Records.
As someone who has a place reserved especially for music that is probably deemed as creepy or whatever, it is no surprise that Little Death Machine are one of my favourite new bands. They remind me of other bands I love such as Natural Assembly who make dark and beautiful music. There is tension in their music that is just fuelled by Clare’s destructive drumming and Daniel’s unapologetic thrashing on guitar. They make noise for those who aren’t afraid to play their music obnoxiously loud and flail about to it.
Velvet Skin is their new single, and is equally as rambunctious as Hit Me. Hit Me is aggressive to the core, but not to the point where you cannot listen to it. The complete opposite. You find yourself singing along with Daniel as he cries out “HIT ME!” Velvet Skin is a tantalising taste of what is to come from them. Little Death Machine have an undeniable talent that is sure to give them a cult like following, much like Cold Cave have.
Velvet Skin’s video is equally as eerie the song. The black and white video adds something quite sinister to the song. The drums are heavy on Velvet Skin, and the beautiful thudding sound is I think, what makes this song have that haunting feel to it. It does feel like something is creeping up on you. The drums sound like footsteps of something terrifying; it keeps you on edge. Little Death Machine make music that is exciting to listen to; there really aren’t that many bands that are doing this right now. Most are scared to be as dark like this, but LDM drag it out of you, and when it comes out- it feels good.
What I adore about Little Death Machine is that they have a brilliant raw sound. This makes you realise instantly that their music comes from a really special place. I think it why you just treasure them right away. I’ve yet to see them live, but I think I’ll be making my way to their Electrowerkz show in November (Met line permitting!) It’s 4 days after my birthday, so I may treat myself. On record, you can hear the fury and passion. I’d imagine live this just erupts into something wild and throws you into a state of delirium that you probably don’t want to come down from.
Like I’ve said before about LDM, there is nothing typical or conventional about them. They make rowdy music that is just good for the soul. Nothing should ever be typical or conventional. Stand for something, and go against what is wrong.
There is something about fans of The Smiths and Morrissey that just stands out from fans of other singers/bands. I’ve never really met anyone in person who truly got my love for Morrissey. Maybe one or two, but that’s it. Those who truly get the love for him are the ones I’ve seen at Morrissey shows. The ones who cry as soon as he walks on stage, the ones who sing every word back to him knowing that it is one of the many songs of his that saved our lives. It doesn’t need words, because the actions of us all just sum up our feelings perfectly.
There are times where I’ve worn one of my Morrissey/The Smiths t-shirts and a knowing nod or smile has been thrown my way from a stranger on the street. Once I was waiting at Piccadilly station in Manchester on the platform, and I was wearing a Morrissey shirt. Stuart Maconie walked past me and smiled. That was pretty cool. I’ve had a woman in Liverpool stop me as I was walking through the street, grabbed my arm and asked if the M tattoo on my arm was for Morrissey. You feel something quite powerful and a mutual understanding when this happens. It makes you feel something that probably wouldn’t mean as much if it was another band or singer.
One of these encounters happened again today.
Today is a year of my girlfriend and I being together, and this afternoon we went out for lunch. On my jacket I have a badge with Morrissey’s face on with the words, “It’s so easy to laugh, it’s so easy to hate. It takes guts to be gentle and kind” around it. A voice of a young chap said to me, “Excuse me, is that..on your badge..The Smiths?” I said it was. He replied with “I Know It’s Over.” An d we agreed on the beauty of the song and spoke briefly about his autobiography which is FINALLY out next week. That short interaction with someone about a person who has evidently been one of the biggest influences in your life not only makes you proud to be a fan, but it makes you glad that someone else also gets the importance of Morrissey.
Of course you do get these people who seem to love just saying nasty things about Morrissey. They label him as miserable (obviously they don’t get intelligent humour) and such things. However, you cannot please everyone. And why on earth would you want to please everyone and win people over? No thank you. For me, I love Morrissey because he manages to express every ugly feeling I’ve ever had in a way that makes it feel alright. He exposes the feelings we are told to push down and ignore in a way that makes you feel less vile for having them. He also dislikes the Royal Family, which I fully endorse. His words for so long have been my life. He’s changed my life in ways those who TRULY love him will only know how. If you’ve only ever heard of The Smiths because of 500 Days Of Summer and have never listened to another song by him or The Smiths- they will not get it at all. That’s alright, they probably love another band/singer in the same way. Everyone has that one singer/band that they will defend until their very last breath.
When someone stops you in the street to acknowledge the t-shirt you are wearing, and you both exchange understanding acknowledgments- it just makes you even more proud to be a fan of that band/singer.
There is one video, I believe that truly sums up how much us Morrissey fans love him and what it means to love him. Oh and of course the atmosphere you can feel whilst at a Morrissey show:
Morrissey fans are the most passionate and loving fans. They know what it is like to truly love a singer with EVERYTHING they have. They’ve rinsed their bank accounts to just see him live. They’ve declined sleep to travel to see him. His music is our life, and I doubt we’d have it any other way. Many of course will continue to slag off Morrissey, but he’s still around. He’s lasted longer than most, and his words are the lifeline for so many. He is someone who you don’t just play in the background and carry on with whatever you’re doing. You play his music daily and you feel every word deeper than you did the time before, and the time before that. Your love and respect just grows.
Music is a massive part of my life, and I’ll always stand by that Morrissey’s words are why lyrics mean the most to me. Seeing songs like Speedway live was like a healing process of sorts. Seeing I Know It’s Over live was something I’ll just never forget- the words went deeper that time, for obvious reasons. It’ll always be my favourite song by The Smiths. I do believe that no one but Morrissey should sing his songs/ The Smiths songs, but Dum Dum Girls cover of There Is A Light is my only exception. Always. His words may be delicate at times, but he gives you strength. Feel alone, feel weak, cry- whatever. It doesn’t matter, and you shouldn’t be ashamed of having those feelings. He was the only one to have taught me this, and I’ll carry it around with me for the rest of my life. The songs that really did, save my life.
This year a band called Loom have pretty much been responsible for creating a sound I’ve started looking for in other new bands. I really really don’t want to hear someone with just an acoustic guitar babbling on about things that hold no meaning to me. Nor do I want the overuse of synths plaguing my ears. I want something loud and obnoxious. I want music that is the opposite of who I am. I want the music I listen to borderline deafen me as I listen to it. I want it to bring rage and Lord knows what else. I want it to be the kind of music I just lose myself completely in. When I saw Crocodiles this week, I saw a bunch of people just lose their mind to them; that’s what I want to constantly hear. It moves me more than any other kind of music.
So when I checked my emails earlier and saw something from a band called Valentine Gray, I knew I wasn’t being sent something that would emotionally ruin me. Instead I was being sent something that made me feel like I did when I first heard Loom some time ago. That relief that music with this amount of fight, fright and passion. There’s a sense of urgency in their music and it fills you with something entirely spooky. Ross has a beautifully haunting voice that makes you think you are in the midst of a Thriller film. Or maybe he’s out to corrupt your dreams. Either way, I don’t think anyone can deny just how great Valentine Gray are. As I listen to the demo of their song, Fruit, all I can hear is a wealth of potential coming through. It doesn’t matter how big this band could get because they are the kind of band who will no doubt end up with a cult following. Bands like that are the bands you cannot help but believe in. Just look at how well Loom are doing.
The reason as to why I’ve mentioned Loom a few times here is because they have asked Valentine Gray to play at one of their dates as part of their residency at the Black Heart in Camden on the 24th October. Both bands are brilliantly loud, so if you’re okay with going into work slightly shaken and deaf the day after; go to the show.
Their songs just ooze such fury that fires you up and makes you question everything and everyone. That’s just how it should be. They make music to thrash your body about to; which is why they are the perfect band to support Loom in a couple of weeks. There is no doubt they’ll fire up the crowd with their unapologetic energy. Valentine Gray have a raw feel to their music which is found in the likes of PJ Harvey to Captain Beefheart. Sure they sound strange, but why would you not want to be? It’s fine to be a little weird and a little wired. That’s how you wake up the genius in you. Valentine Gray are a band that will thrive off their cult-following that they will no doubt have. This is the kind of music I want to hear. If it has no fight in it, then it just won’t work. Valentine Gray are going to be just fine, that’s a given.
Valentine Gray’s bio on Facebook states, “Alternative to not very much that isn’t already an alternative to something else.” They are simply, ahead of their time. Their style is like a catharsis and brilliantly brooding.
I should be asleep. I want to be asleep, but tonight’s show has left me wanting to right about it right now. I can’t switch it off.
This is my second time of seeing Crocodiles full set. I saw them at the end of August, and I was lucky enough to interview them. I said it then, and I’ll say it again- best live band and Brandon and Charlie are two of the most loveliest and genuine people I’ve ever met.
The show at Bethnal Green was phenomenal. There was an undeniable energy in the room and I think it was due to the fact that it was the end of the tour. You could feel that the show was going to be memorable.
Again, Virals were the support act and again they were brilliant. Their set was only around 20 minutes but the crowd were moving their bodies to the tunes. There’s no doubt that I would pay to see them again. A truly brilliant band who deserve a lot more recognition than they get. If you want Ramones kind of songs with gutsy riffs, then you’ll enjoy Virals.
Before Crocodiles came on stage they obviously did a sound check; I had my back to the stage as I was talking to my friend. I felt a hand on my shoulder “Hey Olivia.” I turned around and it was Brandon; he gave me a hug and we both asked how each other was. An unexpected gesture pretty much made my shitty week less shit. I was counting on tonight to be my time to let everything that’s annoyed me go. And did it? Of course.
Crocodiles come on stage and blast through their back-catalogue. There is something about hearing Refuse Angels live that just makes you want to throw your limbs about and gently throttle the person next to you. Maybe don’t do the latter. Songs like Neon Jesus, Mirrors, Teardrop Guitar and Refuse Angel send the crowd into a frenzy. At one point I think there was a mini moshpit going on. Or it could have been a bunch of drunk people having the time of their lives. I think the highlight for most people was the crazy guy that is Omar. He shoved some of us, but who cares!? He was enjoying himself like everyone else does. He disappeared for a bit, but returned at the end for the encore. Someone also stage dived a few times which was cool.
You know a band are one of the best live acts around when they cause the roof to leak. A few of us felt some liquid drip onto our heads, and I think most thought it was someone throwing their drink about. Maybe Omar was getting rowdy at the back! But the ceiling had water seeping through. Crocodiles were close to tearing the roof off Bethnal Green Working Men’s Club!
It’s sad that this is the end of their UK/Europe tour, but I was fortunate enough to see them twice. Each time they’ve given me hope and the ability to let go of my troubles as I watch my favourite band play my favourite songs. Tonight it was Me And My Machine Gun that really did something to me. The hazy guitars allowed me to sway it all out. Of course I sang my heart out to every song and moved around a bit. Crocodiles just loosen you up, and their shows have this raw energy that I can only imagine those who have seen the Ramones live will know what I mean.
What I really loved the most about tonight was seeing the old(er) guy from last time I saw Crocodiles here again. He was stood near me and I could see him enjoying every single song. The crowd was full of people of different ages and races; it was beautiful to see, as always. I could quite happily see Crocodiles play all the time. Their energy is infectious and just brilliant to watch.
Crocodiles are a rare band. There aren’t that many that play with a passion as pure as theirs, and tonight they seemed to give all they had, and the crowd realised that instantly. Each song was played with fury and perfectly. My ears are ringing, my body hurts and so does my throat. I’ve evidently had an excellent time.
Some things happen to us that make us question our worth. A person can make a dig at us and make us think we don’t matter. Or something in your circumstances can make you think you’re not good enough. The thing is, no one really has the right to ever determine the worth of a person or to really judge a person’s situation. But we do, and it is no thanks to the government that cause most to judge others who seek help from the government. There is a fine line I know, with accepting help and taking advantage. Those on benefits are tarred with the same brush, making everything really really shit. I can’t promise to write eloquently with this.
I graduated from Uni in 2009 with a degree in Music Journalism & Broadcasting. Yes, most think it is useless. But I got a lot out of uni and if it didn’t cost so bloody much to go I’d have done a Masters. I love learning; I get bored easily and I need to be challenged. If I do nothing, I become irritated. If I do nothing, I am nothing. Or something like that.
Before I finished Uni I was applying for jobs that were apt for my degree and experience. I was frequently greeted with rejection telling me I didn’t have the right experience. I’m nearly 27, and it turns out I STILL don’t have the right experience, and maybe I never will. See, I love music and I love writing- I know I’m never ever going to make a living out of it. I know I don’t write in a way that speaks for the masses nor do I write anything that deserves a payment for. My words will never be featured in The Guardian, I’m alright with that. Not a fan of that paper anyway. Music publications are dying out, and Melody Maker was probably the best one. The magazines/websites I write for and have written for are ones that do have content of worth, and they don’t pull bands apart in order to get people to read their content. I’d rather be unpaid for writing about music and for a publication that has morals than the complete opposite. I’m not materialistic and having lots of money has never appealed to me. I own two pairs of shoes and my clothes are slowly falling apart. I’d look stupid dressed up anyway.
So after Uni I did a few internships and worked at HMV over several Christmas seasons. Working at HMV gave me a sense of worth. The people were brilliant and the customers were mental. I frequently was sang to by customers, “Do you know this song?!” If I got it right, I’d usually get a hug. I’m all for hugs. I was a magnet for pensioners and the socially awkward, I enjoyed it. I got to speak about music and suggest new music to people. Then it ended.
Anyone who has ever had the delight of signing on will know how awful it is. I spent just under a year on JSA when I was living in Stoke. I stayed in Stoke longer than I should have done. I didn’t want to admit defeat and go back home, but I knew I had to. The amount of friends I had was decreasing and my reasons for getting up in the morning was slipping from me. I was living in a house that was covered in damp, the bathroom was ruined and I was sleeping on a mattress. I lived on a street that was hounded with drug dealers, more than likely prostitutes and general troublemakers. I lived two doors down from drug dealers who tried to sell drugs to my friends when they’d come round and I’d have things yelled through my letterbox..god knows what. They were probably looking for someone. I’d go to bed at 4am and wake up at 8am. I didn’t want to sleep in case someone broke in. Of course I couldn’t defend myself but at least I could run out, if I could. I also had nothing of worth. I still don’t.
I’d sign on every other Friday. People at desks next to me were either dealing with people who had failed to come in or had someone sat in front of them giving them reasons as to why they hadn’t looked for jobs. I used to go in with sheets of paper with lists of jobs I had applied for. I was never made to feel like I was doing anything of worth when I’d present this bit of paper to them. I didn’t feel like a 20 something year old. I felt like a child seeking approval from someone who could easily stop my £50 a week and I’d be, to put it bluntly, fucked. I never turned to my mum and asked her for money. For the most part I was living off toast, cereal and mashed potatoes. However, my mum would sometimes do a shop for me if I was really desperate. I was always desperate but I kept going on. At one point I asked about help with my rent, and I was told “We’ve done a calculation and we can give you £1 towards it.” I wish I was joking, but I’m not. Of course I was annoyed, but what else could I do? Fortunately my rent was cheap. I moved back to my mum’s that Christmas (2011) and had a Christmas job st HMV. That ended, of course.
I then had to sign on again on the Isle of Man. Most job centers assign you an advisor. Someone sits with you, and they look for jobs with you and give you some guidance. The Isle of Man doesn’t do this. You don’t sit down with anyone, you line up as if you are in a post office and this glass is between you and the person you sign on with. “Any work or changes?” No. No I still feel useless and I have no idea why I bother waking up. That hasn’t changed. Frequently I was belittled by them for the jobs I was applying for. “Have you thought about applying for jobs that you CAN do?” As someone who has been rejected by supermarkets, I’m unsure what my capabilities are. I was applying for jobs in England and on the Isle of Man. Jobs that required virtually no experience. They just wanted someone with a degree and good communication skills. I know my limits. I know what I can and can’t do.
I left the Isle of Man in June this year as I was fortunate to get an SEO Internship with a really good digital marketing company. I was being paid for it, which is bloody rare. I was only meant to be there for a month but was kept on for 3 more. It was totally new to me, and I loved the experience. Sadly no permanent role was there, but the experience I got there was extremely useful to me, and I hope has strengthened my CV.
Reluctantly I signed on last week. It wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be, but maybe it will become more and more painful. The hardest thing about signing on after working is knowing there is nothing you can do. You know people are looking at you as you walk to the job centre. I’m not taking your money to inject it into my arm nor am I taking it to feed 5 kids. I have no kids nor do I have a substance addiction. Not everyone who goes to the job center is a dole scrounger. There are people who have been made redundant, graduates etc. There are so many that want the chance to work, but sadly some companies cannot offer that.
When I apply for jobs I know I’m either going to be ignored or rejected. I’m slowly getting that “Why do I bother” feeling back. There’s a small part of me that knows I must, but the other part of me knows this is all useless. The harder you try, the less you realise you should bother. I think I can vouch for most people who are on JSA that when they are told “But you’re not applying for everything are you” really pisses them off. You’re more than welcome to go through my emails and see all the applications I’ve filled out (for paid and unpaid work) no two jobs I apply for are the same. Supermarkets and other retail places say I don’t have the right amount of customer service experiences. Has the job gone before I even hit send?
The government is frequently trying to find ways to improve the job market and how to cut benefits. You’re made to feel as if it is your fault that you cannot find work, but what else is there to do? Now, I do know that there are some who do treat getting benefits as a salary/living wage and that does need to stop. People do take advantage and in the long run, we will all suffer even more so for the government’s mistakes. If you tell the jobless they can only have their JSA if they pick up litter; what happens to the person who actually does it for a living? Will they be struck off because they’ve found someone who HAS to do it in order to keep their benefits? Would David Cameron or any other politician be able to cope on £70 a week? Would he want to pick litter up just to keep his benefits? He’ll say yes, but we all know it is just another lie falling out of a politician’s mouth. He wants to cut benefits for those under 25s. People cannot help their situations, and some do really need that money. A 19-year-old is kicked out of home and has no means to support themselves; David Cameron would rather see them on the street than give them a helping hand.
I have no idea why I’m writing this. Maybe it is because my self-esteem has gone from “alright” to non-existent. I have no idea. Maybe I’m just angry at how people on benefits are perceived. I know I’m in the minority with my views and maybe I could have written all of this in a more eloquent way; but how can you portray anger at the situation when you phrase everything carefully? I’d rather speak my mind and have an opinion than stay silent.
When I’m asked where do I see myself in the next 5 years, I really have no idea. Hopefully I’ll one day be able to wake up and have an actual career rather than wasting my days looking for something I’ll never have. I used to be quite sure, but I don’t know. I really don’t. For now, I guess I’m just another hopeless statistic.
I’ve got Morrissey’s words to carry me through though.
When I was at college I was a big fan of The Cribs. I enjoyed their Garage rock sound and probably enjoyed the fact they’re from Yorkshire too. Easily swayed, but not anymore. The Cribs played fast and their sound was unlike the rest. It’s been a while since a band has pulled off that sound in the way The Cribs did. I’ve not listened to The Cribs in some time; I sort of lost interest after 2008/2009. Typical.
There’s a band from Dublin called The #1s and they remind me of The Cribs when they first started. They play fast and with fury. You can hear a clear and raw distinctive sense of urgency in the vocals. Their songs are the kind you are supposed to scream back at them at one of their shows with sweat falling freely from your face and it trickles into your mouth as you scream the words back. The morning after, you’ll have a sore body and you’ll be unable to speak. This happened when I saw Crocodiles last month, and I’m hoping it happens tonight when I go see them. Lord knows I need it.
The #1s self-released a cassette, Italia 90 and it’s my favourite thing I’ve heard by them so far. I love how every song feels like a slight punch in the gut. I think it was released a few years ago, but since then they’ve released a 7″ on Cork/Leeds based Art For Blind Records and later this year they’ll be featuring on The Big Itch Club’s 7″ which features Faux Kings and my personal favourite. September Girls. Big things are happening for The #1s and they truly deserve it.
What I love about their music is that they are capable of unleashing all the feelings that make us feel fed up. I feel fed up and disconnected from most things, which is why music is a huge help. The older I get, the less I relate to everything around me. I don’t know what kind of person this makes me, but if I think about it- I just get more annoyed at myself. Music is the one thing I’ll only ever lean on because people are not permanent. And I think to be dependent on a person sort of weakens you. It’s alright to be weak though, that I know. I’m not a tough person at all. Never will be. Music is a crutch. My point is, The #1s make music that unleashes the shit feelings we feel in a very real way. All too often bands do it but you cannot connect due to how they project it all. Or how they act. Bands like The #1s are obviously true to their words, and you connect. I’m just speaking for myself, so there’s a good chance I’m wrong. But that’s okay.
The #1s have a new song called Sharon Shouldn’t which is released 4th October. In Europe it will be released on Alien Snatch! and in America on Sorry State. The release will feature two b-sides, Boy and Girl. It is an evidential step-up from what they’ve previously released, but it is as rambunctious as their other songs. Sharon Shouldn’t is their third release; it is slightly more ferocious than their past releases but clearly shows how strong the band are. If this is the first time you’re hearing the band then I highly recommend you explore their back-catalogue. It is full of blissed-out gems that will fit any mood.
The #1s are a band anyone can relate to, and with most things in life separating ourselves from others it is good to know music is probably going to be one of the few things that bring people together.
I used to find it really difficult to write about brand new bands because I wasn’t entirely sure how I was meant to approach it. With no previous releases to mention and the like, it was a bit difficult. But I suppose I found it difficult because I’m not someone who makes things easy for themselves. I make a mess out of decisions and I’m hopeless with words when I speak. I’m not sure how I am with writing words; I have no ego to feed so it doesn’t really matter.
If I’m correct, Alex and Matthew who initially started Coquin Migale are from Scarborough. That’s in Yorkshire. Yorkshire is the best county in England. Most will dispute this, but they’ve not experience the delights of that fine county. They are missing out. Coquin Migale are Yorkshire’s answer to The Drums. They have this lovely surfer feel to their music; a dreamy escape from the horrors of every day life.
Coquin Migale only started making music in March this year. Personally, I think they’re better than half the crap we’re forced to love right now. They don’t use synths to make up for their lack of talent (nothing against synths but lay off the demo button or something!) Their talent is undeniable and Alex’s pleading vocals are just stunning. They did start out as a duo (easily could have been one of my favourite duos if there was still only two of them) but they’ve added two more members Stevie and Jack.
I’m not sure what they sounded like as a duo, but I’m going to make a bold assumption that they were still brilliant. The band recently recorded an EP in Hexham and are currently working on getting their music heard and playing gigs around the Newcastle area. Newcastle, you are truly lucky to have a band like this spoiling you with their music. Be kind to them.
What I really love about Coquin Migale is their dark 80s feel to their music. When most try to sound 80s, they sound like an even crappier version of Wham. The best thing about the 80s was the dark side to it. The side that gave us the likes of Sisters Of Mercy (they got their breakthrough in the 80s) and The Cure (Seventeen Seconds onwards.) They have a sinister feel to their music but Alex’s vocals sort of tame the dark vibes slightly because his voice is so gentle.
Their song, Icarus is 5 minutes of excellence and off the one minute mark it transforms from being quite vulnerable to a really authoritative masterpiece. Even if two of them weren’t from Yorkshire, they would still be one of my favourite finds of 2013. The fact that they’ve not been making music together for long is mind-blowing. All they have is an EP, and it is enough to make you wish they had more. In time it will happen, of course.
On record they sound incredibly tight, and I’m yet again making a (positive) bold statement that Coquin Migale are more than likely going to be amazing live. There is next to nothing about these guys online, but only for a small amount of time is this Newcastle four-piece going to be a hidden treasure. There is something about them that just HAS to be heard. They have the same level of fury to their sound that is found in the likes of (hate the word) “established” lo-fi/surfer bands that are based on the West Coast. They could easily take them on. Worth Your Time is a prime example of how tough this band is. Hearing a band so early on in their career is exciting because you just know they are approaching amazing things.
All the luck in the world to them, but I don’t think they’re going to need it.
There are musicians who, even though you’ve never met them and may never meet them, sometimes feel like the closest person to you. You feel close to them because they tell your story better than you could. You’ve tried many times to unravel every feeling and everything that goes on in your head. For the most part, it is pointless. Things don’t always need a meaning but things need truth. Voices do need to be heard, and when our own isn’t loud enough there is always someone else who has the guts to be our voice. To be louder and be as brave as we wish we were.
I’ve always had a small yet solid number of musicians that have been my voice and that ounce of hope I needed to get through most things. They are the musicians I wish I was as tough as, but I’ll never be tough. I may look as if I am pissed off most of the time but I’m not. Although I dislike the current state of the world, it’s never anything that personal. I’m grumpy but only because I’m getting older. I dislike a lot of things, and it is easier to vocalise them. If you talk about the things you love, it is easier for people to mock your interests. But you know what? Fuck them. No, not literally. No thanks. Grubby bastards. Courage crept up on me late in life. It smacked me in the face a few years ago. I’ll stand up for anyone but myself. I was once hit in the face for standing up to some racist prick. It wasn’t a hit that was painful. Maybe because I was proud of myself for speaking up. I do have a point, but I know no one is reading much further. Which means I can write what I want. Be free with your words.
When Not Your Kind Of People came out last year, I went directly to the last track on the record; Beloved Freak. I somehow had a gut feeling that this song would be one of those Garbage songs that fellow Garbage lovers would turn to when everything was ugly. I knew immediately it would have the same meaning to me that The Trick Is To Keep Breathing would have to me. The Trick Is To Keep Breathing dragged me through my teenage years, and partly through adulthood. I’m nearly 27; I don’t have it right and I know I never will. I don’t think any adult ever truly has it sussed out. You just make do and carry on, because the alternative is..well, I’m not sure.
I played Beloved Freak and cried. What a surprise!
For as long as I’ve been a fan of Garbage (since the start) their songs have meant more to me than I can put into words, songs like Beloved Freak just sum up exactly why I love them and why they saved this lost soul. I’ve watched various live clips of Beloved Freak and I’ve seen Shirley choke up towards the end as she sings. The power she has with her words is just beautiful. She doesn’t need to write lyrics that are made up of ridiculous metaphors to make her point. She goes right to the core of the emotion and executes it in such an honest way that most wish to shy away from. Everyone has their own struggle to overcome on a daily basis, and I firmly believe that music is one of the very few things that make life a little bit easier.
“You’re not certain when you feel. Hurt get violent when you deal With how the world drags you along You’re not alone.”
Maybe I’d have been braver if this song existed when I was a teenager, but as an adult listening to this, it makes every emotion feel less ugly and less of a chore to carry around.
The thing about Shirley’s words is that you KNOW she means every single one of them. When she sings songs about despair and self-hate, you know she has felt that way herself. That is what makes her words more powerful than I can get my head around at times. Beloved Freak feels like, to me, her way of telling the person who is listening to the song that in the end, you’ll get to a point where everything is alright. It may never make sense, but you’ll get there. It’s like she’s placed her hand in yours as you drag yourself through each day. There will come a time where you won’t be dragging yourself no more; instead you’ll be walking with your head high.
There are many parts in this song that have come to mean the world to me, for reasons I don’t think need explaining. Shirley’s lyrics have always been obvious for me. Much like Morrissey. You know exactly what they mean and you connect straight away. When a singer/band isn’t afraid to be so open with their music, you know you’ve found something you will have a connection with for the rest of time. The other day I thought about what it would be like if I never was a fan of Garbage. Would I harbor certain feelings forever with no clue as to how I face them? I have no idea, but for the better, Garbage helped me grow up and adjust. I’ll always feel slightly awkward in the skin I’m in. I’ll never fully like myself, but I don’t let that define everything I do and the person I am. If I was happy with myself, I wouldn’t work hard towards anything. Carrying some self-doubt helps.
Beloved Freak isn’t just a song to me. It’s something I turn to when that sinking feeling kicks in. It isn’t as frequent as it once was. I always mention that I love bands/singers that are really open with their words, and I guess that is why I write like this. Maybe it makes me a total prick, I have no idea. But music is my life, and with songs like Beloved Freak- I couldn’t and wouldn’t have it any other way.
“People lie and people steal. They misinterpret how you feel. And so we doubt and we conceal. You’re not alone.”
People will always make you feel as if what bothers you is insignificant or that you’re dumb for having such feelings. Let them waste their time on being foolish, you just carry on. They’re not worth the thought. We learn to hide how we feel in order to keep a sense of normality around us, but let it be known that nothing is normal. Morrissey taught me that. And he’s utterly right.
Bands like Garbage are there for you to no longer hide anymore. Everyone is different, and how you cope with life is how YOU cope with it. People will judge, but you have to go with what you feel is right in your heart. These are just a small fraction of what Shirley Manson’s words have taught me.
“This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine.”
Music is my light. Be a beloved freak. Don’t let the fuckers push you around and don’t let anyone ever tell you how you should be x
Beat In My Bones. 