What do YOU know about the Isle of Man? Let’s be honest, not a lot. Not a lot happens there. Not a lot to do, nowhere to go. I grew up there, and I have a love/hate relationship with the place. There are some stunning beaches there but if you want to feel shit, then walk round Douglas town centre. HOWEVER, I will say that there have been and there are some brilliant bands that have come from the little rock in the middle of the Irish Sea, and I am SO happy to write about the debut record from the best band around from there- Croteau.

Croteau have been around for a few years and fun fact, and also a way to make me feel old- I went to high school with guitarist Ali’s mum. Croteau are everything you could want from a local band who are evidently going places. Their sound is pretty much unlike anything else around, and it’s that rage and level of ferociousness in their sound that makes them so appealing.

What I’ve really loved seeing the lead up to the release was the band sharing music and books that have inspired the record. A lot of it includes books and bands I was listening to from like 14/15 and still do. Knowing that writers like Camus, Bukowski, Burroughs and of course the greatest- Ginsberg are being shown to younger generations still gives me a lot of hope. Punk ain’t dead- it’s everywhere. Some bands that inspired the record are New York Dolls, TJAMC, Fugazi, The Stooges- come on now! You can hear it right in the record, and it is so fucking cool. I always thought my uncle was the coolest person on the Isle of Man and was in the best band from there (The 13^th Pillar closely followed by The Bastinados with THEE coolest of ‘em all, Raz) but Croteau are definitely up there. They’re the best new band from the IOM for sure and absolutely the loudest. I really hope some UK promoters get hold of them and get them over to the UK because there are so many venues that their sound could beautifully destroy. YES Basement or The Castle in Manchester would be ideal for them. Alright, so praise aside for everything they do. I need to go into the record. Buckle up.

13 songs. 13 perfectly crafted Punk anthems. These are the songs that some kid in Year 7 or 8 on the Isle of Man is listening to as they walk the corridors waiting for the day to end because the walls at school trap you. I say this as someone who had the worst time in high school. Music was my escape. Some kid trying to find their way is going to be listening to this record as they go about their day and it’s going to grip ‘em, and by Year 9 they will have found their people and started their own band. It may not be this year; it could be in a few years. But they will find this record when the time is right for them, and they’ll have their mind blown and eardrums ripped wide open and ruined in the best way possible.

Every song needs to be played loud and maybe go louder than you think with this one. I absolutely love the song Mandy- it’s one I keep going back to, and what I love about this record is that I feel like I’m finding bands like the Ramones or The Stooges or MC5 for the first time, and I’m being sucked into this world where anything is possible but I’m also angry at how fucked the world is. Every song is an anthem just crying out to be screamed back at the band. Fragile Piece? Genius. Loaded Gun? Work of art. Manic? 34 seconds of angst-ridden BLISS. The whole record oozes rage in all the right forms, and the want for change but also knowing the world is corrupt. There are no tender moments here. There is nothing but beautiful loudness and urgency.

Play this record loud enough to disturb your neighbours, and your neighbour’s neighbour and beyond. Throw your body around to Get Nowhere. Get those frustrations out. They’re the most dangerous band on the Isle of Man, don’t you know! This is the kind of danger we need. That bite and that passion in the music.

If this is how they sound on their debut record, then there’s no telling what their future holds. They’ve got IT man. Whatever you want a band to have, Croteau have got IT.

The kids are gonna be alright. It’s adults that are the problem.